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Rumor Mill Buzzing About Alabama OC Lane Kiffin

Image via Zimbio

Image via Zimbio

University of Alabama offensive coordinator Lane Kiffin is a lot of things to a lot of people—almost all of which are terrible—but the one thing he isn’t is boring. A brutally toxic mix of smugness, arrogance and meanness, combined with his unparalleled knack for failing upwards, have made him one of the most loathed men in sports.

By now we’re all conditioned to think the worst of Kiffin, which is why a little Tuscaloosa gossip on Thursday quickly sent the rumor mill spinning out of control. Before we get into exactly what’s being said, please note (for legal reasons, if nothing else) that nothing has been substantiated. Judge the credibility of each individual rumor for yourself.

Let’s dive in!

The whole thing was sparked by rumors that Kiffin had been fired, which the university flatly denies. Speaking to TMZ Sports, Josh Maxson, Alabama football’s director of communications, said Kiffin’s employment status has not changed, but refused to offer any additional comment on the “stupid” and/or “crazy” rumors.

Okay, so maybe Kiffin didn’t get fired, but did he resign?

And if he did resign, why did he resign?

Is it because he left with a booster’s wife? That would be pretty bad. Although there are probably worse things…

Whoa. Is it because he got in a fight with his boss? That would be extremely bad. Although there is definitely at least one worse thing…

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Is it because he got in a fight with his boss because he slept with his boss’ daughter???? It doesn’t get much worse than that.

This one would be so easily dismissed if we were talking about anyone but Lane Kiffin, who is as soulless as he is incompetent, and Kristen Saban, who once beat a girl almost to death with her bare hands. The apple sure didn’t fall far from the tree in the Saban family.

Stay tuned, but don’t expect official confirmation on anything beyond Kiffin’s employment status. Let’s continue to speculate wildly in the meantime.

Haven’t heard one yet!

That’s all we needed to hear.

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